Am I the only one that thinks that the people who coined the Black Lives Matter phrase need to copyright that shit? Like, I can’t fucking put Just Do It on a shirt and sell it without catching some sort of legal trouble. Yet it seems like these days people are freely making a lot of stuff with BLM on it, and I’m like — how’s that OK?
But that’s not really the point of me writing here to talk about the legal implications about using black lives matter to sell things. Which I’m sure people have already thought about in more sustained and appropriate ways than I just did here.
I am mostly talking about the use of the phrase to convey something about one’s values, without any real thought about the meaning of those words. Someone sneezes, you say “Bless You.” Someone does something you don’t like, you say “Black Lives Matter.” I’m growing a little tired of people referring to BLM (™) to stand for something in and of itself, a convenient, plastic badge of allegiance.
I’m especially growing tired with people who don’t live the meaning of those words. Which I’m just going to say like this: If you do not really know or love a black person (or any person of color for that matter) then I’m not sure how you can say Black Lives Matter. Well, I mean, you can say whatever you want. You can put on a shirt and wear it, and put it on your Instagram handle or say that you care about it in the abstract to feel righteous and powerful. That’s your prerogative, I guess.
But, in my humble opinion, you can not believe or truly live those words if you do not, in your own life, love and know a black person.
Basically: it’s not about the words, it’s about the love, stupid.
Many people have commented that love is not something you say, but something you do over and over again. It is not revealed in words but in action.
Similarly, to say a life matter does not convey anything other than that you have said those words. And you can say those words over and over again. You can say them as much as you have breath to breathe.
But what are you doing to show that that life matters?
As a black person, I have to live that phrase every day. It’s not about to which cause I donate money. It’s not about what my Twitter says. It’s not about the vague demands I make of others.
It’s about the way I listen to myself when I am angry about mistreatment. It’s about the way I’ve stood up for myself countless times when someone wanted to tell me (directly or indirectly) how little I deserved. It’s about how I pick myself up and dust myself off, time and time again after the daily, unrelenting negative messages I receive about my worth. It’s about how I really fucking try to taste and feel the good things of this life even though racism makes a lot taste and feel like shit. Like a fucking cold hot dog with a soggy bun. Like the crackers at the bottom of the box. That fucking shit man!!! Like something you shouldn’t be eating.
In other words — it’s about the love, stupid.
So to me, it seems really hard for me to believe that people live the meaning of that phrase, Black Lives Matter, if they don’t love or know a black person or person of color. Which is not to say the support (financially or otherwise) isn’t important and worthwhile. It is just to say that if you use that phrase, if you refer to the movement whenever you want to convey Your View on Things, but you don’t know or love a black person — then what are you really doing?
Are you, perhaps, just using it to feel Right and Good and Special?
In other words, are you taking more than you are giving? Are you taking this phrase that has been used and to my knowledge not monetized by its creators and using it to serve your goals whether they be emotional or financial but not living the truth of those words?
Because if you were you would be giving to the movement more than you were taking from the movement and if you are using the phrase of the movement to sell merchandise or to feel smart and right then you are taking and not giving at all??
And if you are doing that, aren’t you missing the entire point, which is not about You and not about Your Views and Your Beliefs.
It’s about the love, stupid.
Ultimately, I could be wrong about people’s motives or thoughts or beliefs. But when I sit in some spaces in which people become red in the face going on and on about Black Lives Matter, I’m like uh oh. What we are talking about is not love. What we are talking about is a private club that’s membership relies on making the right sounds at the right time. It might even come with some soft white towels. It might come with a nice jacket. A head nod and wink that says, you’re one of us. But it ain’t love.
And where does that leave us?!??
The other day I was walking down the street and saw a biker coming at me at near-full speed. I was alarmed. I moved quickly to the right, just missing him by probably a few inches. He seemed to not see me at all. Or not care. It wasn’t clear.
He was, however, wearing a Black Lives Matter shirt.
Damn, I thought to myself, I guess black lives matter until they get in your way.
Rattled yet amused, I went home. I sometimes choose humor over fear. A choice I make because, well, my black life matters.
